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Erica Cornelius

Parenting a Child with Trichotillomania



Not only does the word “trichotillomania” look scary, but it can also be daunting to pronounce. Even if this is a new term, most people have heard of its meaning without recognizing it.


Trichotillomania is the act of pulling out hair. It’s not uncommon for young children under the age of seven, and it typically resolves on its own. With children aged eight and above, however, it’s less likely to be something they grow out of.


How you handle parenting your child with trichotillomania can make all the difference. Here’s some helpful information. 


Gain an Understanding of Trichotillomania


What exactly causes trichotillomania isn’t fully understood, but it is important to know that it is a disorder. As of 2013, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, in its fifth edition (DSM-5), started classifying trichotillomania as related to OCD. In some cases, it’s a symptom of other mental health conditions.


It’s also entirely possible that it is a coping strategy for dealing with stress. While you may not understand it, for your child, pulling their hair out may be a means of gratification or feel good for their system.


Your child might have an uncontrollable urge that prompts them to do this. Sometimes, it’s more that the skin around the hair follicles may feel irritated or like it’s burning. They have to pull the hair out to find relief. These urges may make it difficult to focus on any other task until they’re taken care of. 


Have a Healthy Discussion


Depending on their age and the circumstances surrounding the hair pulling, your child may not understand what is going on. Even if they do, they will likely feel embarrassed or ashamed about this behavior. Lecturing them, getting mad at them, or raising your voice isn’t going to be helpful or productive. If your child feels attacked, it may lead to lying or hiding their behaviors rather than uncovering and addressing them.


It’s crucial that you remain calm and express your willingness to be supportive. Show them that you love them regardless of their condition. Let them know that this isn’t their fault and there is a way to fix it.


Take time to have conversations with your child to understand what’s triggering this behavior. Also, use this time to educate them about what trichotillomania is. Help them better understand based on what you’ve learned.


Look for Alternative Coping Strategies


Trichotillomania is often used as a coping strategy for anxiety and life stressors. This could be a result of a starting a new school, moving to a new town, witnessing parents fight with each other, a new sibling, or a number of other things. 


Being able to identify the exact trigger could be difficult as it could be stemming from a few different things. With careful observation and discussion with your child, you might be able to pinpoint the cause. 


Encourage them to talk about their feelings. Explore alternative coping strategies with them. Give them something for their active, fidgety fingers to do. Maybe they’ll pick up a new hobby of painting, crafting, playing a musical instrument, or cooking. 


Track Stress


Understanding the root of the behavior starts with understanding what is causing them stress. Try to work with your child on awareness of their emotions and learning how to manage them. Create a fun way for them to incorporate their feelings and emotions into a tracking system. 


When they’re stressed, look at what times of day are the worst. See what activity they’re doing or who they’re around when it increases. Once you know what to look for, you can start to utilize relaxation activities to offset some of it.


At the end of the day, trichotillomania is a real condition that you can help your child with now. Fortunately, there is help available through professional intervention. Contact us today or read more on our Child Therapy page to learn more about our services.


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